Approaching towards end of courtship period

It's been almost 8 months now that we know each other and been together.....8 long months....we shared lots of joys, some sad moments, anxity of meeting and being together and a few moments of separation....some secrets from the past and some hopes for future.....she's all around me and occpies my mind and thoughts....

This long courtship period meant a lot for me....actually, for both of us! I learnt how to think about other person before you do for yourself...loving someone is not all....standing by your commitments is also necessary for keeping your relationship alive....i learnt to keep awake so that she can rest peacefully and i stay alert so that she could afford to relax without fear.....

She made me change without even forcing anything on me....for me relationship is now not about how long i stay close...it's about how intensely i stay close....being committed is much more than mere having fb sharings and a few outings together...it's all about promising her a permanant companionship and full honesty in relationship....

Mutual trust came into picture at the right time and i think it will play an important role going forward....she trusts me a lot and that increases my responsibility multifolds....i think I need to always strive hard to withstand and justify that trust and never ever let it shake in life!!

we are approaching almost to the end of our beautiful courtship period which was really a fascinating time of our life....we had great moments together and most of them have been captured in pictorial memory!! still a lot was unsaid, unheard and when we think about it....we only have one feeling in mind...."some things are good unsaid...even better unexplained and the best if understood without expressing....." i think our love is the same..

hope we have great time ahead together....share our duties and responsibilities....stay close together and be there with each other at every moment in life...may God bless us with lots of happiness, love and faith which will be the driving force for both of us in many more years to come!!

Me and Her!!!

April First Week-2011:

I saw her first time at her aunt's place. She was sitting right in front of me and also kept looking at me intermittently. I saw her for a few moments and actually couldn't guess what was so appealing in her?? Did she look too beautiful?? or were her eyes saying something? couldn't really guess....I asked a few casual questions and she answered them....we were surrounded by quite a few no. of relatives...both her and mine who were hoping that we select each other as our life partners and move on....were things that simple??? ...i didn't know!!!

April Second Week- 2011:

I met her at a coffee shop in Mumbai on a Saturday evening...she was carrying her charismatic smile and two cute little dimples on her rosy cheek....we met first time without any interference and mediation of family members.... someone had to open up...so i took the lead and broke the ice...started a conversation with formal questions and then moved on to some more specific questions....an hour passed....still the question unanswered...is she the right one for me???

April Last Week- 2011:

I was still unsure and I think she was also feeling the same. We again met and I almost threw a series of questions at her....she kept answering and I started realizing that my questions were all not enough to know her better....all I could sense throughout this time was her calmness, smile and clarity of mind which was appealing though she looked puzzled sometimes....I started thinking,"am I looking for a girl who's got most promising future and career or am I looking for one with most promising attitude and approach towards life?"...I got my answer from my truthful mind...which said...."she's the one....go on!!"

May Second Week- 2011:

We are talking to each other sometimes on phone...sometimes send emails....but still a formal chat....I asked her for a date one evening and she said Yes!!!.....how do I impress her?? wear expensive attire?? do some make over??...wait a minute....do I need to do all this or just let me be what I am??....afterall, that's the one she liked and said "Yes" to; was without all this camouflage....I met her and took her to the movie....we had a dinner and then dropped her at her place....end of day!!!

May Last Week- 2011:

I had a plan to go for the tour outside Mumbai for 8-10 days...obviously couldn't take her along with me (would love to do that; but who will allow me before getting married???.....damn!!)

She had retuned back from her vacations when I left the city....and my goodness.....I started missing her like anything.....first few days were very heavy as I was atleast 2,000 KM away from her (and also a few thousands feet higher on altitude!!!).....was missing her day and night....and that time realized...actually I had started loving her!!!!....is this true?? I didn't know...all I knew was that I was feeling lonely and incomplete without meeting her or finding her around me....does this happen to all??

June Second Week- 2011:

Finally we met after a long break of around 3 weeks....the reunion was fabulous....both of us were excited and exchanged the gifts that we had brought for each other....she was happy to see me again and first time realized that her happiness is actually linked to mine and it grows multifolds with her!!!....wow!!!

There were so many things to share...some from our trips and some others....I was talking and she was listening...I was staring at her beautiful cute dimples on her cheek all the time and she blushed finally....God!!!

June Third Week- 2011:

It's her b'day and I had planned for it since long time...she being fiancee this time....so was too very special....at the stroke of midnight I called her and played a "birthday tune" on guitar...she was overjoyed!!!...me too felt romantic...calling your beloved midnight and playing guitar for her....hmmmm....thank God the neighbours had no objection!!!...an exchange of a few love messages and then all became quiet....!!!!

We met for her b'day celebration....she was so excited to see me around and also wished if I could be with her on all her forthcoming b'days in life....quite optimistic thought....I liked it....more than the gifts, her face was lit with the smile as I was present around her!!....promised her to be with her forever and also wished her many more beautiful b'days ahead in life....they say God exists somewhere up above in heavens...must be true...I have an angel in my life to gift me love and blessings!!

Early July 2011:

She's become part of my life so much that I can't imagine a day without her....do I also have the same importance in her life???....well, I don't want to know...all I know is that I am in love with her...truely, deeply forever...how many times do you realize that someone comes in life and occupies it entirely within short span!!!..we share all our sorrows, worries, joys and excitements as well...feels like she's part of me...my very existance and reason for being there in this world...what else do I say??

July 3rd Week 2011:

First time in life, experienced a pain in mind when I was miles away from her in some different country...with different people and that feeling was quite painful....I couldn't see her and talk much with her although could message....she'd come to see me off before flight...but that's it...couldn't even kiss her bye!!!....it was a short meeting and many things remained in my mind....she had given a bar of chocolate as token of her love and care and my mind was full of emotions before leaving her hand....

God...please don't take her away from me for a moment...can't bear it...they say the world has come closer now...if so, why people appear far off when you cross boundries??

July Last Week 2011:

We met again after a gap of two weeks...had lots of things to share with her and as usual she was ready with her magical smile....took her hand in my hands and felt the warmth in her touch...why does love give you such experience that when you are apart you want to get closer and when you are close, you feel it's never enough close..expressed my deep emotions to her and she too reciprocated.....it's amazing how one person can change your life so much!! My friends say I am changing and changing for good reason...if so, certainly my angel's spell has caste its effect on me...am spellbound and don't want to get out of this magical euphoria...can someone tell her be with me, be for me and be mine forever in life??

We have come a long way ever since we met first time...it's fantastic to experience her presence, her soft emotions and warm touch that gives me all the comfort in life....what's true love???...well for me...she's true love..my love who taught me to commit, to express and to be honest with the emotions and the beloved one!!..

Thanks darling for being there with me and around me!!

Charolya

शांत स्तब्ध रात्र असते,
सोबती गार वार असतो
तुझ्या माझ्या गप्पांना,
साक्षी ध्रुव तारा असतो!!

काहीच बोलायला नसलं,
की तू खूप खूप रागावतेस
तुझी चूक तुलाच कळल्यावर,
हसून गोड लाजतेस!!

तुला पाहून क्षणभर वाटलं,
जणू आभाळ मनात दाटलं,
पहिल्या सरीत मी भिजलो,
अणि धुंदीत पुन्हा निजलो!!

मला नाही समजत तुझे
भेटायला इतक्या दूर येतेस,
आल्या आल्याच निघण्याची
तयारी करायला लागतेस!!!

सूर्य व्हायच्या ऐवजी मी,
दिवा होवून राहीन.....
कुठे तरी अंधाराला
जाळत विझून जाईन!!

Bye Bye 2009!!!!

Yet another year is about to end!!!! What's so big about it?? Every year it usually happens this way....year comes and year goes.....and it gives some sweet and some bitter memories.....
When I try to see what the passing year has given me I have a box of mixed emotions....some extacy, some anguish....some pain and some joy!!!
I came across and missed a few good chances to make my life more beautiful....a cute, lovable girl from Delhi....sweet and vivacious friend in Mumbai....a missed relationship...a broken heart...few bitter quarrels.... some tears and a few curves on face....all packed in one bunch as "combo offer"!!!!
I met God a few times in form of my 2 sweet friends who always care for me and like me the way I am....they are not just part of my life...but also a reason for me still being hopeful and believer in Love!!! Their existance and support always makes me feel better and firmly believe that I can be a better man!!....I just love them both....Thanks to God that they are there!!!
How can I miss my angel who keeps fighting with me for small reasons and also sometimes cries loud to me?? She makes me feel that I am not alone in this world with her existance and always keeps me happy with her giggles...she is sweet...she is charming...she is naughty and she is stubborn...but most of all...she is mine!!!
As someone said in past...not all relations that you carry can be fulfilled....had a few broken bonds as well and it hurt badly to both parties....can't help it...it was to go that way only!!!! soon I forget...better for me!!!
A cool breeze in hot summer is my sweet li'le niece who doesn't know how to say "uncle" or "mama" but makes me "mama" with her mischevous smile and tiny appearance...God bless her!!!
There were many moments of joy...my trip with my office group, trip to Delhi, trip to Murud-Janjira and a few outings with my friends....someone may not find big deal in them...but they are all special....coz none of them can be repeated again in life...no matter how many years pass....!!!
Missed all friends in Delhi on last day of my stay there and especially good time spent with them...they all took good care of me and I think those joyous moments cannot be braught back again....
There was a missed farewell and missed hug to say "goodbye" and I will have to take it as "carry forward" from past year to new year!!!
Overall it was bit pain....bit gain year...but every end comes with a hope to have better beginning as we approach to the farewell to old 2009 and welcome of 2010....let me make my slate blank yet another time to let the time write new scripts over it...."bye bye 2009....hum hain rahi pyaar ke...phir milenge chalte chalte...!!"

Seashore Diary

Saturday, 19th September 2009:
1100 hrs: Left home with my family for yet another advent to one of the exotic holiday locations at Murud Janjira. I have visted this place several times before, but feels like new place everytime I be there. Every journey that I do, gives feel of something different and new although the same route and same destination......don't know, what is there for me every time I leave the home and that is why surprises me every moment!!!!
1500 hrs: Was in front of Birla Mandir near Revdanda (Alibaug). This temple; completely made up of marble and engulfed in lush green and thick lawn gives a refreshing feel to my mind.....not sure, whether I get fascinated by many idols in the temple or the surroundings of the temple that make me spellbound there....there's something for sure....especially those innocent faces of Radha-Krishna who keep telling me the importance of love and faith in life.....something I always longed for....and yet to find my own!!!!
1700 hrs: Reached Murud....my favourite holiday destination....this place is awesome....with marvellous coastal line adorned by white-brown sands and clean sea shores and lots and lots of coconut and beetle nut trees that completely cover the skies!!! And over & above all, the calm and slient atmosphere very unlike cement concrete jungles where we stay in now a days like trained animals.....

Sunday, 20th September 2009:
0600 hrs: Got up with roar of sea which was just opposite to my residence in Murud....actually a few metres away from the sea shore.....felt like sea was calling me to share some friendly talks....afterall, we were meeting after a long break....who knows what secretes he wanted to share this time??? which unexplored land he was going to explain to me and which new gift was lying in his heart that he was gonna reveal??? had a walk across the shore and said "hello" to the rising sun....my day began!!!!
0900 hrs: Left for yet another venture with sea....this time it was destination "Dive Agar" a beautiful village in coastal parts of Konkan....where there is miraculous Ganesha idol made of real gold....The mystery was revealed in 1997, when an old lady found a medieval Ganesh idol buried in her gardens.....left for Dive Agar from Murud and decided to take the aquatic route which was more fascinating.....caught a launch from nearby jetty and roamed through the channel between Murud and Dighi....the journey, although was around half an hour, was very exciting and could feel the sea breeze and lots of water around....awesome man!!!!
1100 hrs: Was at Ganesha temple and was stunned to see the historical wonder being worshipped as deity. The half idol of Ganesh, completely made of real gold and displaying prominently, the mideveal wonder with lots of characteristics of contemporary art and culture....it was found in a copper case with some old script...... wonderful...one thing surprised me....there was hardly any security up there!!! People were coming in and going out...but no security!!! Whereas in places like Mumbai....even Gods are escorted safe with security 24 x 7... and a real gold God was left all alone....sometimes I wonder....how much over dependent we are on others for our own well being???? We haven't even spared God from this....ain't it???
1430 hrs: It's food time boss!! and what else could be a better lunch than fried fish and Prawns currey with lots of rice??? Had it stomachfull and had "Sol Kadhi" as digestive drink afterwards....sorry boss...bhare pet no blogging....only sleeping....an afternoon nap....wake me up at 1700 hrs....zzzzzzzz!!!!!
1700 hrs: Went to the beach for evening walk....it was still crowded with a few youngsters playing around and a few young guys and girls roaming carelessly with hand in hand.....good to see them roam like this by seaside...at least, they aren't bothered here by policemen and goondas like Mumbai beaches...

Monday, 21st September 2009:
0630 hrs: It was my last morning at Murud and obviously I wanted to talk as much as I could with my roaring friend...actually he was trying to wake me up earlier...much earlier...but it was my laziness that kept me in the bed for too much of the time...couldn't help it....at least this much one could afford to do especially when one drinks a couple of bottles of beer previous night....it was party time last night.....went to the sea and found him a little choked...was it a low tide that hit him early morning or was it the feeling of getting away from me which i was also experiencing simultaneously!!!! Wasn't a much exchange of words....mere talks with eyes...his waves were reciprocated with a few drops of tears from my eyes...both were real and a bit salty....does sea weep within himself??? why is his water salty like tears???
0930 hrs: The biggest attraction of Murud Janjira....the janjira...meaning the aquatic fort was in the sight and i remembered all my previous visits there!!! With all different friends and groups...yet each memorable due to some reason.....this fort is a marine wonder and one of it's own kind of a historical monument.....sadly much ignored by government and insulted by visitors who like other monuments, have maligned it with lots of litter, dirt, wastes, garbage, water bottles and indecent behaviour....only Allmighty knows when are we going to get awakened on this issue of preserving and respecting old historical monuments??? Do we behave similarly at homes as well?? I suppose...not!!! Still we call us "civilized people" and "mankind".....if we are human beings, may be animals are better breed!!!! Roamed in the fort with other fellow tourists and saw the much seen historical wonders yet another time....was amused with the huge, giagantic structure of the fort, huge, heavy cannons that are still telling the stories of ancient history.....and wonder how it was possible logistically??? Wasn't it a miracle to build a castle in water???? and we still were called "primitives" by foreign rulers....frustrating!!!.....was entertained by a tourist guide who was enligtening the facts and history with some "tadka" of shayri and light soulful jokes..wonder, how much of it was fact and how much was fiction!!!!
1530 hrs: It was time to pack bags and go back to where I came from....from natural beauty to man made forests.....on my return journey, saw Kashid beach...one of the best beaches in that region....and remembered a few previous occasions where I had visited Kashid with my few friends...felt their absence and first time realized that some things are incomplete without some people...no matter how complete the frame looks like!!!!! Just passed by it and had several thoughts of previous picnics to Kashid beach. Remembered a cricket match on hot burning afternoon sands of beach, evening plunges in sea, some teasing of colleagues and then late night moon walk on cool, silky sand....all came across in a flash!!!!
2000 hrs: Reached home with lots of memories and "post its" of Murud trip....thankfully all of them were sweet... only sad thing is all good things soon come to an end....am I streching this too much??? if yes, then this must also come to and end like all other good things!!!!